The Never-Ending War: Will Gender Dynamics Ever Harmonize?

Will the questions around third-wave feminism regarding creepiness ever be resolved? If these traits are inherrent to a large portion of men then is there an end to the #metoo movement? Are there social changes that would satisfy it so that it would disband? Well, no. This is not to say there are no social or policy solutions to the problems they highlight, there are. Yet, they don’t use statistics or science to determine if they have won nor do they have an objective definition of “creepiness”. As long as girls subjectively feel creeped out and are “uncomfortable” then there is no end. At the lower end, the aims of the creep-oriented parts of third-wave feminism are nebulous and vague. At the level of women feeling uncomfortable, the war will never end. Is it wrong to make someone feel uncomfortable? If it is then the oppression will continue forever.

However, that is not the only reason the war cannot end because one of the major problems in resolving the issues at the lower end of creep-oriented third-wave feminism is that women tend to want more masculine and dominant men and the safer men are men they don’t want and whose advances make them uncomfortable. It’s an impossible situation. They are attracted to more dangerous men and are creeped out by less dangerous men. There is a significant segment of women who want a world of safe bad-boys and where only hot men ask them out and anything that’s not that then makes them uncomofrtable and is wrong in the moral normative. They also want to be protected by their fantasy partners which means they want to be a damsel in distress which means they want a world of danger which means they will selectively believe statistically unrepresentative true crime media to believe.

While it is impossible to make the world completely safe for women, there are subcultures and venues where women are much safer which many elect to avoid. As mentioned in earlier articles, girls almost never get hit on or creeped on at coffee shops and if they did craft beer there instead of regular beer at a regular bar and if they went to parties where people were not shit-faced drunk, they’d be much safer. As long as danger is more fun than safety, women will always be in more danger and if those women find safe men lame and label them creeps for advances on them then there is no escape from the creepiness. The American public didn’t react well to Jimmy Carter’s “Malaise” speech and the expectation to sacrifice for a moral cause is seldom a popular one but, ultimately, the only way for the creep-oriented parts of third-wave feminism is for the women they seek to protect accept the sacrifices required to be safe.

A step they will have to take before they win is to give a metaphorical malaise speech. To abandon the idea that responsiblity is victim-blaming because it is not. Everyone has a right to go where ever without having their person violated but also that it’s irresponsible to fly a passenger jet over Ukraine. It may be a plane’s right to fly anywhere without being shot with rockets but it is the responsibility of pilots to not fly civilian aircraft into known danger. The flight will be longer and less convienent but that’s the responsible and ethical thing to do. Not having alcohol at parties and measures like that are a sacrifice, stomaching nerdier but safer men as partners is a sacrifice. Demanding that dangerous venues be safe will be an eternal conflict and regarding one’s comfort as paramount and tantamount to safety sabotages otherwise safe options. The mature and ethical course of action is to sacrfice pleasure and comfort for ethics and safety.

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